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That's really great and all... - A monkey with a keyboard
phuul
phuul
That's really great and all...
Shortly after I woke up Tuesday morning I received a call on my cell phone. The caller ID was blocked so I didn't answer it. Then my phone rang again, caller ID was also blocked. I decided to pick up because I thought it might be my wife calling in trouble. Here is the conversation as close as I can recall:
Me: Hello?
Woman: Hey baby how are you?
Me: Uh hey.
Woman: What are you doing?
Me: Who are you?
Woman: My name is Amanda sugar.
Me: Do I know you?
Woman: Oh I want to fuck you.
Me: Ah. That's really great and all but I have to go to work.
Obviously I hung up at that point. I got a several things out of this though. First of all I was kinda rude. I mean if someone paid for me to have a phone sex call I should have at least enjoyed it. What? You think someone didn't give me the gift of a phone sex call? Yeah that is probably more likely. I should have explained that "Amanda" had the wrong number, I mean she is only doing her job. The second is "ZOMG there is still a phone sex industry?" Seriously with all the internet porn? Third is that someone in Colorado is kickin' it old school with his masturbation.

This experience did remind me of another incident, I think it was back in 2007 but I'm not completely sure. divatreasure and I received a late night/early morning call from a heavy breather. Yes another "ZOMG people still do this?" moment. She answered because I sleep like I'm dead. He called twice more before I decided, and was awake enough, to pick up the phone. I vaguely recalled reading or hearing that most callers like this get off on making women feel victimized. Because of this I assumed that he was very heterosexual. So in my best "Mmmm quest" voice I started saying every possible thing I could think of that would squick out a hetero male. Sure enough after about four sentences he hung up and didn't call again.

Of course when I was at the airport at 3:30 am the next day without my card clip it was a bit hard to get divatreasure to answer the phone. The heavy breathing asshole.

Current Mood: amused amused

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Comments
joshroby From: joshroby Date: February 6th, 2009 02:11 am (UTC) (Link)
I think you're reading this all wrong. Obviously, back in 2007, you changed a young man's life. After thousands of dollars of surgery, he was finally able to call you back to consummate what had become his all-consuming obsession...

...and you hung up on him. :(
phuul From: phuul Date: February 6th, 2009 04:20 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh damn. Now he, well she, is going to setup an evil lair on a volcanic island and concoct some over complicated scheme to bring me to my doom. Curse my sleepy sarcasm!
divatreasure From: divatreasure Date: February 6th, 2009 03:45 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh well, I was TRYING to give you a present and you hung up on her.

At least it didn't cost me much. I mean, considering you hung up, the per minute cost is next to nothing. ;-)
phuul From: phuul Date: February 6th, 2009 05:27 pm (UTC) (Link)
The really funny thing is my brain didn't engage and realize it was a phone sex call until I hung up. I was fully in "Get Annoying Wrong Number Person Off The Phone" mode.
(Deleted comment)
divatreasure From: divatreasure Date: February 7th, 2009 12:25 am (UTC) (Link)
::grin:: Tell ya what, I'll call YOU and we'll have phone sex. How's that for payback?
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